Today is a GREAT DAY! Not only does Kyla start 1st Grade, and Cruze start Preschool; today is my LAST DAY OF RADIATION! These are all such wonderful things to celebrate! My babies are growing up and starting some exciting journeys in their childhood, and I my friends am closing a chapter of my life that I wish never happened, but I am greatful that it did. There is one more reason that today is so special to me, and that is because I am at a place today where one year ago I was not...
One year ago, my sweet Kyla was off to her 1st Day of Kindergarten. An emotional day for any mother. It was also one year ago when my mother learned that she had stage IV colorectal cancer. I was an absolute basket case. My mom was sick, and I was scared to lose her. I didn't know what her future held let alone my own (as I had breast cancer, just didn't know it yet). I looked at my 5 year old daughter so excited, happy, and proud of her to have her entire future ahead of her. She was so excited for that 1st day, and did not look back with any hesitation. I knew in that moment that I must have done something right with her so far. I left her at school, went home and cried a river of tears and said a million prayers to God begging him to get my mom thru her cancer journey as she had radiation, chemo, and surgery in her near future. I begged and begged Him to keep her in my life, as I needed her to grow up with me and my family to see my kids do the amazing things I know they will. The emotions I encountered one year ago were very scary.
Fast forward to today! This amazing day! My prayers today no longer begin with begging God for a 2nd chance at life. All of my prayers begin with thanking God for the wonderful life he has given me and my family. This is going to sound rediculous, but I thank God for giving me Cancer, because even though it's now apart of me forever, it taught me the biggest and most valuable lesson about how to live your life. Am I still scared that cancer and tragedy is going to reoccur for me and my mom? Yes! I don't want this to ever touch our family ever again, BUT I've learned that you have to let your FAITH be GREATER than your FEAR!!
Today I close another Chapter of my journey, my mom is in remission and thriving, and we are here to see Kyla and Cruze head off to another school year! I am so proud and thankful for the happiness I feel in my soul today! I counted, and since December, I have been in this cancer center (where I am currently sitting) about 48 times, and will be here about 6 more times between now and the end of the year. That's just here in Waterloo, not counting my follow ups in Iowa City. It's been a time commitment for sure, but today is a HUGE milestone!! Although my radiation has caused me physical discomfort, from here on out I am going to heal! My mom and I are both physically and mentally stronger today than we were 1 year ago, and it feels amazing! Many Thanks and Praise to the God we have! We could not have gotten thru this year without the absolute best support system of Family and Friends!
So how are we going to celebrate?? BLAKE SHELTON concert this weekend with my mom, aunts, cousins, and family! I can't wait to get one great weekend of fun and celebration in before I head back to work Monday. That too, will be an adjustment after being off for the last 14 weeks, but it means I am moving on with my life, and this is what I've been waiting for all year!!
So, today is not just another 1st day of school. Today is a really good day for me and my family! I hope you all can do something or find something that makes you happy today, and thank God for whatever it is you are thankful for!
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